The Magic is in the Repair
Many people have huge fights, but it is important to repair the disagreement
As a therapist I notice there is a lot of trepidation coming in before the. holidays and after the holidays a lot of old clients coming to me after Christmas about fights that have happened over the holidays.
If you have a massive fight with your child, that does not mean all is lost. Something erupted that might have needed a lot of attention, and that does not mean that any hope of repair is lost.
These are beautiful thoughts and suggestions. Luckily, things went smoothly this Christmas. I asked for daughter to tone down the masculine expression of the outfit she was planning and she did! And she even went so far as to wear a dress!
Thanks so much, Stella. This is exactly what I needed to hear.
It's been a long six years since my beautiful, happy girl fell into this mess and I've worked endlessly (as a solo parent) to maintain our close relationship, but it has all fallen apart recently. My utter exhaustion and terror of impending medicalisation have resulted in some god-awful rows between myself and my just-turned-18 "adult" kid. A lot of painful truths have come out and we can barely be in the same room together.
The good news is that she has agreed to some family therapy sessions with me and an exploratory therapist... We just need to get through the next few weeks before the therapist gets back from holidays. You have given me hope that we can repair things between us.
Happy new year to you.