We are often told that we are only as happy as our unhappiest child. However I have noticed many parents of distressed young people seem to be a good deal sadder than their children. I thought this might poll might be enlightening
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In my experience, what adds to the distress for parents is the feeling of isolation.
My FtM daughter is doing great at college, celebrated for being stunning and brave and all that. (I believe she’s using a trans ID to hide).
But I’ve never felt so out of step with the times. Beyond what’s happening with my kid, I feel betrayed by doctors, psychologists, political leaders, teachers, journalists. These have been the worst years of my life.
My ‘adult’ child’s transsing has brought out a very self centered part of him that I had not seen before. His need for validation for his differentness and for a variety of self diagnosed maladies is profound and confusing to the rest of the family. My deep sadness is in direct proportion to my age, 67, and the loss of much of my family to his behaviors. For better, or worse, right or wrong, I had expected to continue to be connected to my kids in my ‘golden years’. I miss the child I love and who I believed loved me.