there were many points in the conversation where i asked myself, did you ever consider comparing the similarities of this movement with domestic violence/femicide? the darvo, the coercive control, the pms (poor me sydrome of males), the himpathy in public... ?
to me this feels just like an extension of domestic violence. the already open and availabe spaces that were conquered by the fathers/mensrights movement were just waiting to be filled with another ideology that completely silences women. worldwide (industrial, democratic nations) mothers are loosing custody of their children to the perpetrators/fathers when they report domestic violence. lawyers are advising the mothers to never mention domestic violence, because the likelyhood of loosing custody is so high (40%). there is no safe space in family court. in family court the darvo is rampant. they are already doing what this movement is doing to the world, to mothers in family court for years. the similarities are huge.
also the love of labeling oneself in a world that is constantly asking for your excuse to be human is very much understandable. if inclusivity, tolerance and empathy is only available once you labeled yourself, there is something inherently wrong with the understanding of inclusivity, tolerance and empathy. but it makes sense, becaue insurances only pay for your treatment when you've got your label on. its a trade of labels instead of a deep and meaningful understanding of life.
also, again, what this movement is doing is coercive control. look up the definition.
since the definition is made to define mostly domestic abuse, a few points are missing. coercive control is (and i realized this while listening to you) first and foremost mindcontrol. anything and everything the victim regards to be true/real/valuable etc. is constantly under attack and controlled to create a void that is expected to be redefinded by the perpetrator. orientation to oneself, the world, reality, social spaces, values, language, relationships etc. is under constant attack so the perp can create chaos and desorientation to open up and enable control. all being done on a interpersonal level and not physical most of the time. coercive control is also a predictor of femicide, familicide and mass shootings. recognize the similarities?
so, in other words the rethoric has been there long before and successfully applied in family court, femicide, sexual abuse, sexual abuse of children etc... we should all ask ourselves why and how we all participate in a society that enables, enboldenes and rewards perpetrative behaviours in a way that the outcomes are strikingly similar anywhere you look (femicides, domestic violence, sexual abuse, human trafficing, surrogacy, pornography, destruction of the environment, self destruction, mass extinction, veganism, greenwashing, agriculture, animal abuse, racism..).
if we all, or most of us understood violence and that violence is wrong, would this be possible?
Excellent interview--thank you! I appreciate your work so much, Stella.
Ah thanks so much for the lovely feedback
there were many points in the conversation where i asked myself, did you ever consider comparing the similarities of this movement with domestic violence/femicide? the darvo, the coercive control, the pms (poor me sydrome of males), the himpathy in public... ?
to me this feels just like an extension of domestic violence. the already open and availabe spaces that were conquered by the fathers/mensrights movement were just waiting to be filled with another ideology that completely silences women. worldwide (industrial, democratic nations) mothers are loosing custody of their children to the perpetrators/fathers when they report domestic violence. lawyers are advising the mothers to never mention domestic violence, because the likelyhood of loosing custody is so high (40%). there is no safe space in family court. in family court the darvo is rampant. they are already doing what this movement is doing to the world, to mothers in family court for years. the similarities are huge.
also the love of labeling oneself in a world that is constantly asking for your excuse to be human is very much understandable. if inclusivity, tolerance and empathy is only available once you labeled yourself, there is something inherently wrong with the understanding of inclusivity, tolerance and empathy. but it makes sense, becaue insurances only pay for your treatment when you've got your label on. its a trade of labels instead of a deep and meaningful understanding of life.
also, again, what this movement is doing is coercive control. look up the definition.
since the definition is made to define mostly domestic abuse, a few points are missing. coercive control is (and i realized this while listening to you) first and foremost mindcontrol. anything and everything the victim regards to be true/real/valuable etc. is constantly under attack and controlled to create a void that is expected to be redefinded by the perpetrator. orientation to oneself, the world, reality, social spaces, values, language, relationships etc. is under constant attack so the perp can create chaos and desorientation to open up and enable control. all being done on a interpersonal level and not physical most of the time. coercive control is also a predictor of femicide, familicide and mass shootings. recognize the similarities?
so, in other words the rethoric has been there long before and successfully applied in family court, femicide, sexual abuse, sexual abuse of children etc... we should all ask ourselves why and how we all participate in a society that enables, enboldenes and rewards perpetrative behaviours in a way that the outcomes are strikingly similar anywhere you look (femicides, domestic violence, sexual abuse, human trafficing, surrogacy, pornography, destruction of the environment, self destruction, mass extinction, veganism, greenwashing, agriculture, animal abuse, racism..).
if we all, or most of us understood violence and that violence is wrong, would this be possible?